So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
Randomize
