i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
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