How come I'm the only one who's around when people show up? I had just taken a shit, I wasn't wearing pants, phantom of the opera was playing and the fridge said PENIS.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
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