it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
Randomize
