just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
