How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Randomize
