No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Randomize
