I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
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