I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
Randomize