About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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