Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
I want a musical about memes.
Randomize
