so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
