yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
