he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Vodka?
Forever.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
