I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
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