She went from zero to smokin in five shots
wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Randomize
