Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
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