No awkward lesbian experiences without me
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
Randomize