is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
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