farters have to be the big spoon...
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
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