i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize
