Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
