found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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