She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
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