Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Randomize
