I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
