i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
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