Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
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