i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
Randomize
