I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
