Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
i think i scared a bird with my dick
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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