You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
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