I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
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