: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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