I want to stick my p in your. b.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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