Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
wakey wakey hands off snakey
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Randomize
