Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Randomize
