With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
