I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
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