I like my sex mixed with concussions.
my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
