And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Randomize