none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Holy sore nipples Batman
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize