i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
I deserve this hangover.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
Randomize
