this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
