you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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