fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Randomize
