Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
