I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
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