I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Randomize
