spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
